Sex, Lies and the "Le Perv"

Birds do it, bees do it, and men in power do it, it appears – yet again – with extravagant abandon. The french came up with the notion of droit du seigneur, the special sexual liberties that the ruling class can enjoy. Take a look at the avalanche of incidents making headlines recently. All the 'Le Perv's have suddenly become 'Le Idiot-Savant's. Just imagine the elite Rhodes scholar assumed that anything in White House goes unnoticed, unrecorded or unrepeated. Or the disgraced ex-IMF chief being publicly warned in 2007 by equally devious French Prime Minister to "avoid taking the elevator alone with interns. France cannot permit a scandal". What about you, Mr. PM?? Not to forget Arnie's lovechild, Tiger Wood's porn-star addiction, Berlusconi's lurid "bunga-bunga" parties etc. Closer to home, we have a shiny example in Shiney Ahuja. Whats wrong with these powerful men ??


I m pretty disappointed with you guys. You are supposed to be shrewd, intelligent, and definitely discreet! Yes, I do understand that with greater power comes greater zipper issues (sic!). Blame it on the flow of blood in the wrong direction, a wife here and a wife there with few mistresses in the middle is not enough. I am not a feminazi, who is here to wallow about the tales of abuse inflicted on your poor victims. Nor am I interested in any transatlantic culture war - the famous European indifference to the private lives of their leaders Vs the American Anglo-Saxon puritan stance on the same. Honestly its very difficult even to sympathize with wives like Anne Sinclair, who told a Paris newspaper that she was "rather proud" of DSK's reputation as a ladies' man, a chaud lapin (hot rabbit) nicknamed as the Great Seducer. "It's important," she said, "for a man in politics to be able to seduce." Nor do I feel sorry for Maria Shriver who defended her husband's izzat in his 2003 campaign, while he was deceiving both her and her voters khullam-khulla!

What matters the most is prudence, a sense that anyone who has the previledge of power over others, should be discouraged from destroying themselves and their families. Power can be the ultimate aphrodisiac. With power comes both opportunity and confidence, and with confidence comes a sense of sexual entitlement. But just because an individual is a public figure, his/her bad behavior should never be overlooked or covered up. Any skills they might have developed for self-control earlier will quickly and easily deteriorate with slight indulgence. Hence I blame the society, the family and the enablers with a personal or political interest in protecting these "sick men" to the point of covering up their follies, indiscretions and crimes. We are the actual 'Le Perv's.

T-F-L had a summer getaway

Just got back from my weekend getaway Funny I should call that. People travel to nearby places for the weekend, I travelled around 2000 kms for my retreat. And just the weekend was not enough. See here why. :)

Ma, Thank you!

This year Mother's Day falls on my birthday. I couldn't think of any better way to start the celebration than thanking the woman responsible for my existence. Thank you Ma. I m what I m today because of you.

She is and always will be the most important woman of my life. The woman who shared with me not just her flesh and blood, but name too - our names are the variations of the Indian super Goddess - Shakti. No wonder we have our share of occasional shouting matches - too many Goddesses in the house, as my dad puts.

Women,as they grow older, often complains "Oh no! I have become my mother". For me it would rather be, "Thank God, I have become my mother!" But reaching that status quo is not easy. You see, I have a supermom. She is a doctor and a successful entrepreneur, a doting wife and a loving mother of 3, excellent singer and a fashionista of her own accord. She has the talent and patience to design her own attire, whenever she is not busy saving lives or feeding us! A beautiful woman - inside and out, Ma has always been my hero.

Whenever I come across the quote, "The strength of a woman can carry the weight of the world", I can totally visualize Ma, and the way she deals with the trials and tribulations of her life. What impresses me is how she manages to emanate strength from every molecule of her being. Its the same strength that helps me face my troubles. She has always been my beacon through the darkest of nights. The ardent cheerleader yet my toughest critic, Ma knows me better than anyone else. Maybe thats what being a mother is. But for me, she is more than that. She is my first pillar of strength.

Ma has always supported my decisions. Well maybe not the reckless ones. For example she has been bludgeoning me emotionally not to get involved with water sports in Goa. Sometimes I think Ma loves to worry a lot. Or maybe it could be an occupational hazard of being not only a mom, but also a doctor. She feels that something nasty might happen to her kids if she is not around. Well I have tried to rationalize, argued, and finally begged her to stop worrying so much. And every time I get shushed up by her with, "You will know when you are a mother". Of course, there is no counter attack to that. They say a mother's love is the strongest and the purest of love that stays forever. Maybe worrying comes as easy as loving her kids, doesn't matter if I m 5 or 45. But the best part is - she never holds me back from anything, even if she knows its might not be the right thing for me. She lets me make my own mistakes. She lets me fly. And if I fall in my flight, I know for sure that she will always be there to pick me up and help me start all over again. I love you Ma, for having faith in me.

And this is my ode to you. Thank you for the roots. Thank you for the wings.

Its that time of the year

Can’t wait to be 25 in a week!! I absolutely go gaga over birthdays-celebrating mine as well as others. Cakes, candles, gifts, treats and a total recall of the all shit done last year… I simply love the frills and ruffles of this occasion. But this birthday has more reasons to be special.

a)I enter the first quarter of my life (Someone once said, when you are 25 everyone will stop advising you..phew finally!)
b)I get to celebrate it with my cul-de-sac group in Goa! Gonna dance my way into 25..woot!woot!
c)I got accepted in my dream MS program. I never imagined I could make it.
d)Leaving home soon(or, rather running away) and happy to be on my own again. (Living with parents has its own perks, but for me, last 6 months was a personal hell)
e)Physically, I got my mojo back. It feels great to get conditioned and be back in the game!
f)My financial condition is still in the gutter. But this time, I m a poor in a zen-like state of life.
g)Emotionally, I m more sure of myself now. All my wants and needs have been neatly separated in rows and columns, never to be mixed and confused again!

But the only downside of being 25 is - marriage, that too arranged! It’s the curse of the Indian society. The assortment of over-zealous parents, relatives and nosy neighbors kindda makes life of a 25 year old singleton hell. Its not like I don’t have faith in this constitution. But everything has its place and time. For me, in the next 2-3 years I don’t see myself getting hitched to a guy and then be the CEO of his DNA. This is the “me-time” of my life, where I want to completely devote my energy and passion for my personal-growth. How difficult is it for the elders to understand this? Bah,humbug!

Anyways, leaving home and everything familiar behind eliminates the whole marriage scenario for good. Because I think I deserve more from this life. 24 saw me through a roller-coaster phase of my life. And there was ruin. But turns out, it was a gift in disguise. I got challenged to test my own limits, get out of my comfort zone and face the scary unknown. Even though I was kicking and screaming then, I kindda of like what it eventually did to me. I had my fair share of lemons thrown at me..but its tequila time now!

And I learned the most important lesson till date.

"You can’t always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you might find- you get what you need" ~ The Rolling Stones

Why India needs 7 star prison facilties

While different countries are coming up with pompous state-of-the-art designs for buildings to mark their economic, technical and political hold in the world, India should focus on upgrading its prison facilities. Why?

With the recent "arrested development" of the country's corrupted Who's-Who, there is no dum in the prison facilities like Tihar. India's prisons now houses A-list inmates like ex-cabinet ministers - A Raja and Suresh Kalmadi, besides business honchos like Shahid Balwa, Vinod Goenka, Sanjay Chandra, Ramalinga Raju, and several other high-profile "chors and luteraas". A business-class is now a must in prisons. For you never know who will grace the prisondom hereafter(I m pretty sure Tamil Nadu's first family is next on the list)!

I m not sure what punishment is suitable for disgracing the nation. But these high-profile goons should never be let out of prison in their lifetime. Infact all the corrupted rich should invest in something called "prison-plan" rather than the usual retirement plans. The prison plan money can be used to build grand correction facilities that will include spas, beauty salons, gyms,presidential suites, honeymoon suites for couple miscreants(Talwars, anyone?), wine and good food served à la carte...infact a Hilton at Prison is not at all a bad idea! Atleast the black money in their Swiss bank accounts can be used to have a better prison life. Also nothing good can ever come out of blood money; even when used for society's cause it will carry the stain. Hence it should be perished with the owner.

I personally do not support crime and corruption, but sometimes one resorts to weirdest of ideas with the hope of keeping the neighborhood clean. If a 7 star correction facility can attract these high profile goons out of the streets, then why not? Maybe tomorrow the common man might get a chance to live in a much less corrupted society!

Love in the times of Obesity

"Lets grow fat together" sounds really romantic and cute....but only in Hallmark cards! Because after sometime it becomes "lets grow fat and unhappy together"(courtesy: end of a year)..which might have the worst possible outcome of "till obesity do us part".

Sounds selfish, eh? I m sure I ticked all the ladies reading this post. You are possibly arguing this very second with -"this can't possibly happen to me!"

But it is happening. Unfortunately. Research shows not only are married people more likely to become obese than those who are single, but young people who are in committed relationships tend to pack on the pounds too. Obviously staying single can't be the solution. Nor picking on your partner is!

Often, I hear most of my girlfriends complain how their respective boyfriends criticizes them for gaining weight. My only question for the girls - why do you let yourself face that amount of self loathing? There are only two solutions for that - a) dump the guy. b) Get enrolled in a fitness program. Not to impress anyone, but yourself. Staying fit is a serious commitment. It should not start or end with respect to your love life.

As for guys who are seriously concerned with their girlfriends' health, you should actively participate in it too and help her. Criticism alone will not help, it will just make things worse. Do not expect her to go on a salad diet, while you are enjoying your munchies with your beer diet. It doesn't work that way. Amy Gorin, an assistant professor of psychology at the University of Connecticut, published a study in 2008 that showed if one partner participates in a weight-loss program, the unenrolled partner tends to lose about 5 lb. As a couple if you support each other, you both can lose pounds and stay fit - how about some "Lets grow healthy and happy together" times?

Now girls, when I mentioned staying fit, I did not mean unhealthy and artificial ways to stay slim. The worst, even though quickest and easiest method to lose weight is, dieting. I can rant on and on how much harm you do to your body by excessive dieting. Just to fit in your little black dress or get married in a week, you need not get suicidal with your body. What I have observed is that, dieting often leaves you with stretch marks in places you don't want and a funnel-shaped body. But my scariest red-alert for you is - "Gravity: This time its personal."(TMI ??!)

As for the singletons dealing with weight issues, you guys need a workout buddy. She's the one who'll force you to exercise away those extra calories. She'll motivate you to run - "just one more lap" or do "a few more crunches". She can be worse than a task master, but when you see the stunning effect it's had on you, you know exactly who to thank. In this case, its your friendly neighborhood T-F-L!

Happy burning those calories!!